Sunday, February 5, 2012

Dreaming and Sewing

This has been a very stressful week for me. With my Post Traumatic Stress disorder, I tend to like things very scheduled, very regimented. I DO NOT LIKE CHANGE! Change throws me for a major loop, and I have been spinning in loops this week dreading all the change that is to come. It's good change, but my PTSD doesn't differentiate. All change is not good when it comes to PTSD and the ensuing panic attacks. I have spent parts of the last few weeks in full panic, in a drugged haze, or the in the state of peace that comes following a Priesthood blessing. The blessing has ended the panic attacks for now, but my anxiety levels are still very high.

B and I met with a financial advisor this week, and signed TONS of papers, and are one step closer to my most fervent dream coming true. I don't really want to talk about it much, because the superstitious side of me is afraid of jinxing something, but at the same time, I want to shout from the rooftops that things are finally happening! It will be a long road, but hopefully, at the end, is our pot of gold!

Aside from freaking out, and having panic attacks, I have done some sewing. Mom's birthday was on the 1st, and I had really hoped to have her gift done in time, but spending a week in a drug induced haze put the brakes on that plan. Here is a progress shot, and more progress has been made since I took this photo several days ago. The top is done, and I was able to wrap that and give it to her, now I just have to get it quilted and bound.

I also gave her a little snap bag. This was really fun to make. I was at her house a couple of weeks ago, hanging out with her in her sewing room. I started digging through her basket of scraps and made this little star, then I took some more scraps and sashed it. She said "What are you making?" I said "Something for your birthday" and she laughed and said "Isn't it kind of cheap to make my birthday present out of my own stuff?" She was joking of course because she saves her scraps for me, she never uses them. I just laughed back and said "Hey, at least this way I know you'll like the fabrics!" I have to say, I really like how this little bag turned out. It's the perfect size to keep her scissors and threads in while working on her Grandmother's Flower Garden. Which reminds me, I need to show you pictures of how my own GFG is coming along!

I was also able to get another swoon block done. I was trying to do it as a block of the week, with one block every Saturday, but I didn't get a chance to work on a block yesterday because I worked on a swap quilt, and then went to lunch and shopping with mom. But here is block #2 from last week. I do like this one MUCH better than the first one, and also, this one makes the first one look so much better when they are side by side =0)


Mrs. JP said...

I am sorry you suffer so from PTSD. I will be praying that our High Priest in heaven comforts and blesses you each day. This a.m. I read Matthew ll? Come ye who are weak and heavy laden and I will give you rest...My yoke is easy and My burden is light. That verse makes me sigh,,,a happy sigh.
I do like that handy purse you made. I could use that today as I've packed up pieces of my king sized star quilt to go to my mom's so we can work at her big table. My plan, since I have limited space, is to quilt as I go kinda. It's just so big it makes my shoulders hurt just thinking about managing the whole thing. I'll keep you posted, not in tears,,i hope.
Have a great day remembering all the prayers God has answered before.

Liz said...

Sending hugs your way...